Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Monday, August 18, 2008

Opposed to Gay Marriage?

If you are, then answer this question: How does this marriage affect your marriage?

Are you going to dump your husband or step out on your wife because Ellen DeGeneres got married to Portia di Rossi? Are going to start drinking heavily and/or take up crystal meth? Run off to join al Qaeda?

Or are you just the sort of pimply-faced, halitosis-breathed, repulsive, arrogant bastard who fears that every woman on the planet would rather marry another woman then be seen with you?

What, other than the vague "this is the end of civilization" screeds, comes to mind?

Why are you opposed to two adults marrying each other?

4 comments:

Mark Rossmore said...

The Christian stance on gay marriage, or gays period, for that matter, is just so tiresome. Any Biblical references were written down by men who had little understanding or tolerance of anything outside their frame of reference. The word may apparently be God's, but the transcriber was an ancient Hebrew who thought the world was flat and stoning was an acceptable means of punishing your cheating wife. Values have changed a little bit since then. *rolls eyes*

The most commonly quoted passage is of course Genesis 19, the destruction of Sodom. These Christians insist that the Sodomites were destroyed for their homosexuality. They conveniently leave out the fact that the Sodomites were a horrible people, intent on rape, violence, and destruction that just, well, happened to be indiscriminate about who they screwed. It's irrelevant whether or not the objects of their affection were male angels or stunningly beautiful female supermodels. They were evil people that needed to be dispatched.

They'll go on to quote Leviticus 18:22 as well, which calls homosexuality an abomination. "Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable." Well, that Holiness Code also permits slavery (25:44), forbids you to get a haircut (19:27) or a tattoo (19:28), and demands that any child who curses his parents be put to death (20:9). So if you've got a tramp stamp, a buzz cut, or told your parents "F*** you!" during your formative years, you're going to Hell. But if you flew over to Africa and picked yourself up some Sudanese House Slaves, that's perfectly fine. Lovely double standards there in the Bible.

Unfortunately, it doesn't help the gay cause that just about everything else in that chapter of Leviticus really IS an abomination or, at the very least, ungood: bestiality, incest, prostitution, etc. Too bad in that case these conservatives haven't learned to do with these passages what they do so well to other people: discriminate.

Anonymous said...

You know, perhaps all that marital destruction only ensues in Conservatard marriages, because if you look at the sex scandals of the GOP party there DOES seem to be a trend....just saying, you know I get a bit wacky on Mondays. ;-)

Anonymous said...

It totally perplexes me that we still have an institutional ban on same sex marriage.

Two people of the same gender being married would not affect my marriage any more than my next door neighbors' marriage affects mine.

And I do pretty well messing up my marriage on my own. What someone else does or doesn't do isn't going to help me or hurt me.

BadTux said...

Don't you get it? When gay marriage is legal all over, then everybody will get a divorce and gay-marry their best friend of the same sex, and then there won't be any more children, and the whole human race dies out! Gay marriage is not only an abomination described in the Bible, it will KILL US ALL!

Oops, forgot that artificial insemination stuff, and the fact that most people won't gay marry no matter how legal it it is because they are, well, straight, but hey, that's just a few niggling details...

- Badtux the Snarky Penguin