Seen on the street in Kyiv.

Words of Advice:

"If Something Seems To Be Too Good To Be True, It's Best To Shoot It, Just In Case." -- Fiona Glenanne

“The Mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?” -- The TOFF *

"Foreign Relations Boil Down to Two Things: Talking With People or Killing Them." -- Unknown

“Speed is a poor substitute for accuracy.” -- Real, no-shit, fortune from a fortune cookie

"If you believe that you are talking to G-d, you can justify anything.” — my Dad

"Colt .45s; putting bad guys in the ground since 1873." -- Unknown

"Stay Strapped or Get Clapped." -- probably not Mr. Rogers

"The Dildo of Karma rarely comes lubed." -- Unknown

"Eck!" -- George the Cat

* "TOFF" = Treasonous Orange Fat Fuck, A/K/A Dolt-45,
A/K/A Commandante (or Cadet) Bone Spurs,
A/K/A El Caudillo de Mar-a-Lago, A/K/A the Asset., A/K/A P01135809

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Iraq War Reboot

There is a long listing of stupid fucks who should have their lips stapled shut over Iraq:

Dick & Liz Cheney, Tony Blair, Paul Wolfowitz, Condi Rice, Anyone named Kagan, David Brooks, Bill Kristol, Chimpy, Rupert Murdoch and Anyone Who Works for His Companies, Judith Miller, Fred Hiatt, Doug "the Stupidest Man on the Planet" Feith, Thomas Friedman, Paul Bremer, Donald Rumsfeld, Charles Krauthammer, John Yoo, David Bisbee (the "torture lawyers"), The Blackwater Thug Known as Prince, and a shitload of other people whose names I don't have the time to type right now.

UPDATE: From the comments, a great idea. Maybe we should have a fundraising campaign to buy all those chickenhawks plane tickets to Baghdad. On arrival, they'd be given a helmet, a camelback (have to ensure hydration), an AK, ten magazines, and a helmet. Those over 60 (or disabled) would be given a 9mm pistol and magazines.

UPDATE II: Why remembering what the aforementioned jerks said is important.

4 comments:

Peter said...

I have a better idea. Take everyone who calls for renewed US intervention in Iraq. Issue them a rifle and ammunition. Drop them at Baghdad International Airport with a promise that they'll be collected at the end of hostilities.

That should solve the problem most ricky-tick.

Comrade Misfit said...

Outstanding idea, that.

Grung_e_Gene said...

They didn't serve in Vietnam when they were young and fat, they surely wouldn't serve nowadays while they are old and fat.

Stewart Dean said...

Actually, the only thing cataclysmic enough that these clowns might hear or remember it would be to assemble them all on ground zero of a napalm or rolling thunder B-52 strike.

Key Malvina Reynolds singing We Hate to See Them Go...

Last night I had a lovely dream.
I saw a big parade with ticker tape galore,
And men were marching there
The like I'd never seen before.

Oh the bankers and the diplomats are going in the army.
Oh happy day! I'd give my pay to see them on parade,
Their paunches at attention and their striped pants at ease.
They've gotten patriotic and they're going overseas.
We'll have to do the best we can and bravely carry on,
So we'll just keep the laddies1 here to manage while they're gone.

Chorus:
Oh, oh, we hate to see them go,
The gentlemen of distinction in the army.

The bankers and the diplomats are going in the army,
It seemed too bad to keep them from the wars they love to plan.
We're all of us contented that they'll fight a dandy war,
They don't need propaganda, they know what they're fighting for.
They'll march away with dignity and in the best of form,
And we'll just keep the laddies here to keep the lassies1 warm.

(Chorus)

The bankers and the diplomats are going in the army,
We're going to make things easy cause it's all so new and strange;
We'll give them silver shovels when they have to dig a hole,
And they can sing in harmony when answering the roll,
They'll eat their old K-rations from a hand-embroidered box,
And when they die, we'll bring them home, and bury them in Fort Knox.